dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
I'm so hungover that the internet is hard.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
Only the gays. Guy gives me a handjob in the steam, then changes next to me under his towel
Only the gays
I mean he gave me an 'I owe you an orgasm' fist bump
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
Do you think if i wear this shirt with my bengals boxers this kid will fall out of love with me a little bit because that's what I was going for.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
lets start a news segment called WHY IS LEOS CROTCH BURNING TODAY
So here's a tip: don't give a blowjob the same morning you're going to the dentist. Cuz they will think you have "mouth trauma."
just yelled CURVEBALL at my nightie because it turned out to be a pair of shorts
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Life should not be this hard with a dick this big.
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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