I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
So I just used shazaam to figure out a pairs figure skating song. I don't think I could get any gayer.
You are forgiven. I sent you a picture of a pumpkin man as a gesture of reconciliation.
...that's why he's not doing anything with his life except breeding geckos
Woke up on the kitchen floor cuddling with the dummy we made of you. Hope your internship is going well.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
There were penises being pulled out everywhere.
The pigeons can smell the fear
Wtf
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Some small part of me hopes I'm on the probationary list because of seeing the Dean at that fetish party.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
