Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
she just stood in the kitchen yelling "REAL WOMEN HAVE CURVES"
the line runs infront of fredricks of hollywood. it's like gamestop is showing me how pathetic I am.
He compared my vagina to the first time he tried cocaine
Something about getting head on stairs. I don't know.
Did you not learn anything for "HERPES SCARE 2010".........
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Im on my period and I feel like I'm going to die. The only thing that can make this tolerable is for you to eat me out in the shower. Please. I'll do anything.
How many strippers in the world do you think have had a debate with someone about the NRA?
you puked in the bathtub and said "let them pee"
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I think I accidentally invented a religion.
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
You know it was a good dinner party when one of the guests broke their finger and no one can remember how it happened.
Randomize
