I'm at a Mexican Walmart. Wish you were here.
I think we need to take a brake
What upsets me the most about that is that you spelt it 'brake'
my ass just sighed. even my farts are tired.
and next time when you feel me up, do it right
I ride home in a shopping cart. Don't at like you aren't jealous.
You know how i spent all of black friday on the plane? Well guess who's getting a x-mas gift from skymall?!!??
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
Dwarf fight at five guys. Today was a good day.
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Being thankful with your family is one thing. Being thankful with your friends while getting drunk and smoking bowls while eating leftovers, priceless.
If that's all it takes to cure your hangovers then you need to drink more.
I just want to slap everyone in the face that's happy being sober. Loser.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
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Randomize
