On a scale of 1 to 10 how hot is the girl you're about to fuck?
Strong 6
That's an oxymoron.
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Just found my bra in a bag of chips on the kayak floating about the pond. Sure sign of a good night
This guy randomly got in our taxi, and has now collapsed on the sofa anouncing that he's staying the night.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
Your first mistake was not throwing your beer at the RA and running
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I'm the one on the patio wearing underwear. Holding a pipe. Pigtail and glasses. Can't miss me.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
that almost beats the chick I saw smoking a joint while uni-cycling past my house at 4am. Almost.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
I didnt know whether I was going to vomit or orgasm because I was feeling both sensations
Randomize
