Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
He gave me the award for most entertaining blow job. That should count for something.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Welcome to Missouri, the show me your genitals state.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
Fuck that guy and his dumb haircut and awesome dick
Those boxers don't belong to me anymore. They belong to the desert surrounding Phoenix.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Dick is dick
Look decision making is not my specialty
Which is why I just spent $33 on a breakfast sandwich coffee and hash browns
eveytime i go to his house my cute clothes always get taken off what's the point of even wearing them there?
Randomize
