omg. why did you never tell me how amazing shitting and smoking is?
i thought this knowledge was automatically promulgated at the age of eighteen?
just prayed to lady gaga in hopes it will help me pass my fashion merchandising final...what is my life?
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
My drug dealer is making me hot tea during the snowstorm...I'm a fan.
She woke me up with an urgent call telling me she was rolling on Mollie and swimming in the ocean. I mean that's just great. If she drowns, I'll feel responsible.
Well for number 40 i would prefer to at least like the guy attached to the dick
I am both excited and frightened by the fact that this much everclear is legal here. Best vacation ever.
You installed a beer holder in the shower?! You're the best roommate ever!
... That's a shower caddy.
I believe this is a toe-mate-toe vs. toe-maut-toe situation.
There is is 40 year old penis staring me in the face right now if there was ever a time to be a good friend its right now.
DONT YOU DARE DIE YET THERE IS SO MUCH SEX TO BE HAD
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
So as a result of a tragic manscaping accident I've had to shave all the hair off of my legs. The result is... not great
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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