if you're gona send my txt to that site at least change my area code plz
It wasn't long before I skipped the martini glass and went straight to drinking from the shaker.
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
youre totally missing out on eating your boogers right now. my entire face is numb
My motherly instincts are overcoming my slutty ones
Mym mom just came downstairs as I got ghome ans I'm trying to act SO CASUAL as i stabdh here hut icant help bur be like 'girl where's ther Turkey sandwiche s' haahaa
I literally need you to talke care of me soooo9o9oooooo drubj gril makin a sabdwiche. SO far its judst bred and paper towel...
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
We could supplement the Tour with Edward Andre-hands. Because 40s are for the 99%.
She rode an inflatable shark down the stairs. Viva shark week.
Ugh I hate you, and the responsible adult life I pretend to have during daylight hours
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Randomize
