Encyclopedia Brown and the case of the missing condom.
I hope Brown isn't a clue to its whereabouts.
my tits taste like a pina colada. how often do you get to say that?
Did you know even strippers have to have GED's these days??
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
it got awkward when the only couple not hooking up was just watching..
went thru the pain of a Brazilian and he's passed the fuck out while i eat Doritos and watch tbs. fuck married life i want out
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
I'm bringing Sergeant Single Slut out this weekend. I hope you're ready for her.
Hahaha my philosophy professor just opened class with "I had a shitty weekend and I was at the bar until 815 this morning. So bear with me".
Cockoligist
Yes, one may refer to me as that.
I should make business cards.
Dude, I have everything I need for meth here.
YOU ARE NOT ALLOWED TO MAKE METH IN OUR APARTMENT.
I woke up with my earring stuck inbetween my tits. Somehow you fucked my earring out and my boobs saved it. I'm pretty impressed with both of us right now.
BRING THE BAGELS
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