i googled "where to have sex in disneyland." i found nothing.
Jeremys mom is here. I gave her mad jello shots and now were griding. ima give it to her: ultimate payback for him fucking my gf.
How do i write this on his wall without making it sound like he gave me an std?
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
Also, new rule: You are no longer allowed to send me a text with the word "dildo" in it before 10am.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
I miss college girls! You know how depressing it is to fuck 30 year olds? That's what failure feels like
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
This is what happens when you leave: I get all vulnerable and I make out with the cowboy to shut him up about Jesus.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
the sex got boring after the first three hours
holy shit
Yes please. My parents would fucking love him and I'd love fucking him. That's a win-win if I've ever seen one.
I knew the bike rally would be fun when I saw "male pole dancing" on the schedule
Randomize
