we might have left him a semi topless video on his wall. godd i just hope they suspend my accont so i stop doing thses things.....
Soap is not a condiment
Luol and I just scored with two 40 year old married chicks. They dropped us off on the way to soccer prctic. The kids in the back were confused. Call me.
hey my socially awkward cousin is our designated driver for summer, we just have to put up with her wierd shit.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
i havent had this much fun since the last time i farted and it created a boner.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
This drunk girl wants you to know that I do actually like you. I'm not just using you for sex. I think you're cool.
This conversation has now reached a level of awkward that even a passerby streaking hobo couldn't break.
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
She was about to leave with you until you started singing "You Hoes Ain't Loyal" in her face
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
I spanked her so hard I woke up Grandma
I let a drunk straight girl spank me with a metal paddle at the bar tonight. Remind me to never do that again.
Randomize
