and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
I think my penis ruined a perfectly good friendship.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
i figure now that we're number one party school im obligated to black out at least 4 days a week. andddd go.
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
Dude, you can't even imagine the trip, I actually thought that there were Care Bears sitting next to me at the bar, I'm pretty sure I started hitting on the pink one.
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I sang Sweet Caroline with a homeless man and made him 25 bucks. Redbull vodka gives you wings!
Well that's what you get for messing around with her vagina. I told you it was a fickle and insatiable creature.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Sooo, did you delete me cause I said I wouldn't babysit you while you did shrooms? You're a grown man.
Randomize
