we went to that german restaurant and drank out of the boots. Then I threw up into one
dont ever smoke after you drink again... i dont think ive ever seen...or heard of someone throwing up and farting at the same time. that is, if you were farting.
She said she didn't want me watching her give me a bj, so she proceeded to make a "blowjob igloo" out of blankets...
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
Soo time for a life change, my 6 yr old sister made my gf a puke bucket for her birthday
Am I texting you while being used as a stripper pole by two half-naked women? hint: I am.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
I don't mean to insult you, but did you leave your training bra in my bedroom last night?
It's George Washington's Birthday. Can you not put on some red white and blue and get really drunk for the original Merican??
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
Their first impression of me was that I was completely naked. So yeah college hasn't even started yet and I'm already that person.
Do you ever have one of those days when your breasts are just fucking awesome?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
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