I would never have sex with Danny Devito!! JSYK.
can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
i can smell the iron from margo's period blood from across the table.
i hope you realize that ur overconfidence only gave me one orgasm out of all the times we had sex. that's like a 1% success rate. u might wanna rethink how amazing you are.
She helped me organize my comics and then blew me. This is the one.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
Dude. I'm busy doing PR for America. FOR AMERICA. Europeans think we can't handle liquor.
Hahahaha who is sleeping in the garage on our beer pong table?
No! Last time I got hit with a beer bottle
Haha, Tuesday man
There was a trampoline and tequila. It was glorious.
I just faked an orgasm while masturbating. Idk what exactly my problem is but I have one
I'm hungry, horney and thirsty. Pick two you want to help out with.(please pick horney)
Would I do it again? Probably not but still,I don't regret a single ratchet thing I've done in college.
I just told 2 of my vibrators "I love you." I seriously need some dick.
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
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