We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
I don't hate you. My dick is upset with you, but I don't hate you.
chatroulette drinking game turned into a foursome.
Got drunk. Then they sung "we didnt start the fire" to my other cousin who accidentally burnt down the house when she was younger.
My absolute favorite part of last night was after I puked in the ally, we rounded the corner and you screamed, "she's ok!" and everyone cheered
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
You said something about how beautiful my pockets were, then walked away.
Yes talking about pockets is classic me.
It's gay pride, I'm in my EMT uniform getting more girls than your straight ass ever will..
I was too drunk to remember throwing up so i probably didn't learn my lesson
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
