big game today.. looking forward to seeing that magic win, and then i will celebrate with a nude dip in lake Eola.. anyone else in??
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
i just farted in the library and heard some girl yell it was sulfur gas. can. not. move.
she was puking into the toilet drowning herself saying "its okay im a swimmer"
she said my body looked tiny like it was a bad thing and then didn't even mention how great my tits look. it's like we're not even friends.
She literally called herself a shamefully bad decision. Of course I slept with her. Best bad decision ever
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
When our dicks touched he made a lightsaber noise.
smoked four grams out of a bong with a mixture of pool water and white rum. I applaud you for leaving before losing too many brain cells.
Afternoon delight is playing while I take a shit at mcdonalds
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Randomize
