jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
Church boner. Awkwardddd
...just for future reference, one Four Loko can fits PERFECTLY in a venti iced coffee cup from Starbucks
Heading to the gym, the one that guy said he goes to. Already checked online, his class is at 5. And no, this isn't too much after meeting him last night. Stop judging me,
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
You're tall, so I have high hopes for your dick.
Starting the day with sex, coffee and productivity are what the founding fathers intended
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Sending a pic of labia to send to the TN Legislator. Obviously they don't think I know what to do with it so I'm gonna ask them for advice.
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Randomize
