New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
she asked if she could keep her bee antennas on during her mugshot. i love halloween.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
WTF WHY ARE YOU STILL NOT DOING A BEER BONG?! THE TOILET CLOG CAN WAIT
There is a pube in my fucking eyeball
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
Whatever you do tomorrow don't let me put on the Borat mankini and yell "POLAR PLUNGE!!" while diving into the pool
The pool is covered.....
Like that would stop me.
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Holy fuck where did this cat tattoo on my ass come from
Dude, I'm not going to use a butt plug.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
Fuck I think I want to but I don't think I should. Caught between should and wanting.
just follow your vagina
Quote of the day.
Randomize
