Ehh boy. FML. she was unattractively large.
You hook up with other guys, let him talk to other girls.
no
Measuring your booze intake in glasses is like measuring Rosie O'Donnell's weight in ounces.
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
I don't know what's worse, the fact that my parents own a sex swing or the fact that my little cousin was playing on it
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
a pansexual with facepaint started fucking a tall black girl on the bed i was sitting on so im going to mcdonalds
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
When did angry sex become our thing?
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
moral of the story: if your going to mix ambien and free skyclub alcohol, take a direct flight or have a layover in a city you wouldn't mind having to return to for a court date.
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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