The answer is no. Its an illegal search n seizure!
i should write a book entitled 'the joys of being sexually objectified'
Good thing you left when you did - ended up getting banned from jimmy johns.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Impromptu road trip to New Orleans for four days of Mardi Gras. I'll probably be alive and back for Valentine's Day plans, probably won't stick my dick in some random either-might be using my free pass you cheating asshat. Love you. Expect random texts & probably a drunk dial or twelve. You did this to yourself. You're not invited so don't bother. Have fun at work.
He called from a stranger phone to say. He was a t a liquior store and there was a long line they have no condoms. This is the guy i was gonna go on a date with
Atleast he is letting you know he will be late
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
New vibrator arrived today.
How was it?
Who are these wee mortals we call men?
Hypothetically speaking, at what point does fire become too much fire?
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
The best part of being a lesbian? If I'm late for work at a hookup's place I can use her make up and peace out. Well and all the sex of course.
Randomize
