So for his birthday I'm planning on doing what stripper did when she put the matches on her nipples..lights them n makes him blow them out..SEE I AM dating material.
Im not spending 10 to get hit on by potential transexuals even if they are cuter than most of the girls I dated.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Is this one of those "if you didnt give such good head we couldn't be friends" moments?
The reign of the rally queen is over. Welcome to the age of the walking dead.
Goddamn you thin people LEAVE FOOD FOR THE BIGGER DRUNKARDS WHO NEED IT
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
they asked me about my neuroscience major and I said 'the brain is the outer space of the body' and passed out. it appears my ivy league education is not going to waste
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
I ask for a dick pic and he sends a picture of Dick Cheney. Who does that?
I renamed some of my contacts in my phone before passing out and I have one I cant figure out, its "fucking house elf scum"
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Oh also we fucked while one of the old Rudolph movies was playing on tv so it was festive
But I don't see you as the jesus riding a dinosaur with a machine gun type of guy
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize
