Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
there is a puppy in the bar... no really i didnt steal this one
the real housewives reunion is on...i wanna see if danielle can look any more surprised than the facelift allows
i wanna see dina punch her face back to normal
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Hookup with hot guy from gym, check. Wake up to find he's peed in my closet, double check.
they would be such cute babies and they would grow up to have huge dicks. and that would make me proud as a mother
got into a fight with a bouncer over who's moustache is better again last night...
I was informed that last night we held hands while puking on the curb outside the bar.
We just have a real special relationship.
I was able to hide the fact that I had just shit in my pants, and then wupped her ass at FIFA
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
We found him. He just came running out of the closet with a bruise on his face saying he has been fighting elves in Narnia for a year.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
1. I drank goldschlager 2. I fell in a bathtub and hit my head (hard) on a soap dish. 2. I sat in said bathtub talking to a random stranger on vacation from wyoming (who i met at a 711 looking for taquitos) for almost an hour. 3. We got kicked out of said bathtub by owner of bathtub. 4. We had sex.
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