But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
So I don't think its herpes anymore. Could be a sign of diabetes though. Is it bad that I consider getting diabetes 'dodging a bullet'?
I was just making a list of the girls i have slept with and i can't remember your sisters name
Why do I feel like the only way for this trip to end is alcohol poisoning?
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Pre-drinking/conditioning my liver for this impending hurricane party associated with cat. 2 hurricane Irene. Be ready to roll in a weather channel minute.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
It's pretty fantastic. I just wanna know how your bra ended up in the aquarium the other night.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
Tell me why I woke up with your dads construction shirt on, nothing else, and had jelly donuts with a note from a girl named cathryn that said "we had a kinky night with peanut butter". p.s. Im by the layin by the lawnmower
it's like i'm your dad, but instead of reminding you to bring your lunch to school i remind you to take a good long hit from your bong.
Well Jon got a DUI sleeping in the back seat so I thought the trunk was safer. BUT WHO CARES WHY JUSE PLEASE COME LET ME OUT!
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
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