Regardless of the degree, it's probably not good to relate so closely to the Steve-O documentary.
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
You broke a window with your face. I don't think the landlord will be as impressed as we were.
Remind me to tell you the "if you give a mouse a special brownie" story when you get back
the problem with open bar is i never know what to get
did you really just start a sentence with "the problem with open bar is..."
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
But he made me breakfast and understands the fuck sleep fuck sleep necessities
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
He was dressed up as Jesus and had vodka in one hand while he was blessing everyone and splashing them with holy water in the bathroom.
Orientation leader success, day 1: incoming freshman just ate out his first sorority girl. I gave him a 7/10.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Shame is for Republicans.
Randomize
