I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
Theres puke in my trash can and spilled beer next to my bed... come get your girlfriend
Unmistakable female orgasm noises coming from upstairs shower
She must've brought a toy -- seriously doubt that he's up to the task
im not gonna bother asking u how it was... we could hear u through the walls
Escorted a stripper to her car last night,and all I got was a "Thanks" and "Go Steelers."
They high fived mid Eiffel Tower, then we all proceeded to talk about how our friendship is much stronger now. I'd say a successful first threesome.
I would've been fine if I didn't do the three shots
You did like 8
Okay do all 29 year olds have erectile dysfunction or just the two I've slept with?
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
We just got home a lil bit ago. No sorority girls showed except the ugly swimmer chick and she asked if I've ever faked an orgasm.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Because bro, I don't want your dick being touched mid conversation.
I used to sleep with a guy on the USA rugby team... He stole my credit card and my Hitman DVD. I'm more upset about the Hitman DVD..
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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