I just watched a video of Justin Bieber kissing a girl..... the sad thing is that I actually got upset.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
i love all of you. Physical. Emotional. Mental. All of it. When we speak i feel like a feather or a dragon depending on the conversation ...
Nah I'm perfectly content solely banging the married bartender once a week.
That's practically a relationship for you
Last time we talked he was trying to sext me but he was including pictures of fruit
Suppose hypothetically u received a request for face time communication with a gentleman who looked astonishingly like a penis. Would you indulge him in conversation? Hypothetically of course.
Don't know why you're always hating on relationships. I've had chocolate pancakes accompanied by a blowjob and a blunt and it's not even 9 am. Time for mid morning shower sex. Enjoy your morning bong bowl alone asshole
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
Girls at BYU need to learn how to handle a penis. I swear my date last night was trying to pull it off my body to use later.
I knew there was a problem when things got heated and instead of rushing home I offered to get bagels instead
Now that you have a boyfriend, can I have my vibrator back?
I've never had to kick an employee out of bed to go to work before.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
Come over I need help. I just almost died in an acid flashback while listening to do You Feel Like We Do off of the Frampton Comes Alive album.
Randomize
