Letd wlk him
Lrtd walek hime
Lets wlk home,,,ther we go
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
i broke up with my boyfriend last night because i had to eat a freezy pop in every color and he ate the last blue one. i sat on the floor and cried for an hour at least. everyone left. so i decided that this whole weed thing isnt really healthy for my relationships.
Wise words from the guy who drunkenly chipped his teeth on the sidewalk
Crosswalk actually
Weve literally been going out drinking five days a week. That counts as a full time job right?
So aparently telling your roommate you're going to spoon them so hard in the public place of their employment is inappropriate
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
You said you wanted to wrap his dick in a tortilla and make a spicy burrito. Let me just say, most girls don't have this hard of a time getting laid.
The rest of the concert I just stared at the lights and didn't really listen to the music cuz I was trying to make sure my brain still worked cuz my face was numb and I couldn't move... Yeah I'm not a weed brownie person
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I fell into the fireplace. That is a pretty good sign to stop drinking fireball
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize
