my mom just told me how she used to love having sex while stoned. wtf.
I got "discovered a new religion high" last night
Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
We can't have sex anymore. The amount of money I've spent on meds and copays for UTIs is getting ridiculous
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
is cock-oriented a word? I'd say I'm that lately.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
He's carved the words "SLAM STATION" into his headboard...
Soggy bong water carpet is the worst kind of carpet.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
Congrats! Its a fuck boy!
So is seeing the guy's penis that I'm talking to something you're into or nah?
Randomize
