me and my sister are feeding my dog poprocks. this is proof you don't need a lot of money to have fun.
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
it was like a congratulatory penis slap
I have a broken liver
I see that the whole "let's take a break from drinking" has worked out really well for us.
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
I have a third degree burn on my inner thigh from the blunt dropping on me in the car
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
So there I was, eye fucking the waiter and I spilled beer all down my boobs
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Also, if you don't fuck me soon, I will die. I don't want to die like that.
I also don't hate being called a giant sack of cheese. Is that weird?
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
Randomize
