im drinking this country out of the recession.
Only she could turn her genital wart appointment into a date night.
Just got a event reminder on my phone to never party with you again.
during charades she pointed to herself and you guessed 'girl who wants to fuck me'
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Anal and Aoki tickets...I'd say I give pretty good Valentines Day gifts.
I take it we used my cleavage as a pen holder last night during the graffiti party. Looks like the colours of Crayola exploded all over my chest
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I have really important information for you regarding the furry convention this weekend
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
HE CHOSE A RESTAURANT AND MADE A FUCKING RESERVATION. I AM SHOOK
gave up morals for lent, so far it's actually been really easy.
Sorry for not calling you back. I got drunk and passed out on the kitchen floor. I just found my phone in the shower.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
Randomize
