Omg. Budweiser tramp-stamp sighting @ Wal-mart. Best tattoo EVAR.
Maybe you should have studied instead of worrying about who is going to have sex with you
I just gave head in the laundry room on campus. He said it was one of the best moments in all of history. Take that, neil armstrong.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Ive yelled into your vagina. There are few lines we haven't crossed at this point.
She was so morning drunk she asked the lady at brueggers for a bandaid and my self respect back
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
ALSO, I NEED TO BORROW A CAT. ASAP
I woke up at 4am on the floor covered in olive oil and fire extinguisher powder but all I wanted to know was where the rest of my booze was at.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
The room got awkwardly silent right as i yelled "leave him alone! I know plenty of straight guys who like to suck dick!"
He just told me my boobs made up for all the bad things that had ever happened to him. I'm definately having sex with him again.
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