at some point when you're making out with the ex girlfriend of your ex fuck buddy who happens to be the ex boyfriend of the girl that you just got drunk with who was hitting on your current fuck buddy who is best friends with your ex boyfriend, it just hits you: oh my god i need to get out more and expand my social circle.
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
I think i just threw up blood. i can't chill right now;
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
We just had sex on an abandoned logging road while wearing snow shoes. God bless Montana boys.
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize
