? is bags or t-bags slang for scrotum?
jesus mom
my ass has officially been on the floor of every fraternity on this campus
and who said we didn't have goals?
You know how I know it's Spring Break? I just passed a car with "South Padre bound" shoe polished on the back. The driver was blatantly drinking a roadie and getting road head.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
Uggh answer your phone, you are the only one I know who'll be proud of what I woke up next to this morning .
I just realized that there are baby oil soaked hand prints on the wall over my bed. Last night was a good night.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
You fucked a stripper on your sisters friends blow up mattress. The least you could do is wash the sheets.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
I woke up like how did I get here this blanket is nice but it was just the curtain
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
I mean, I bought pot and shampoo before I ran out. I think I can adult.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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