I just watched the Dark knight, Maggie Gylennhaal looks like Katie Holmes after a stroke
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
I actually had no interest in him until he started talking about his 4 arrests. That made him go from a 5 1/2 to a 8, easily.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
Woke up to a bottle of gatorade and a packet of saltine crackers tied to underwear hanging from my ceiling fan, along with 3 advil stuck to a piece of duct tape and a note saying "have a happy hangover- <3 you/me"
Drunk you is pretty stunner.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
Just had a flashback of dry humping a man lying in the street while Jim (dressed as santa) screams 'HAVE YOU BEEN A GOOD BOY?!'
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
It was one of those nights where you get back from the bar and end up staying up till 3AM beating off to facebook photos of girls from college
I am very happy to share that the hospital says the testicle pain is normal and that they are going to take care of it.
He has an accent when he types. I can *hear* the schnitzel. Especially when he's drunk.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
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