But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
so i walked in, looked up the stairs and all i saw was smashed pumpkin, tube socks, and marinara sauce
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Just stuffed an entire cupcake in my mouth after finishing third glass of wine. Valentines day is pretty much going how i expected it.
he was cradling you in his arms feeding you rum straight from the bottle and you kept sucking his fingers.
My weekend will be all about the double d's, desert & debauchery
i have nothing going on in my life. unless a toxic love triangle with netflix and jack daniels counts.
drunk and crying about Shakespeare- how's your night?
I was fingering her and they busted into my room demanding to know who the best running back was, before I could say anything she moaned and said "Barry Sanders"
well at least you got laid last nighT. I woke up on a pile of laundry
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
I want you
Nvm, now I want someone who replies to my booty-call texts faster
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