just met our mailman at a party, he asked me out. i said yes, but only if he picks me up in the mail truck. how jealous are you
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
I sat on his lap and we shared a beer. I feel like that's an invitation to his dick.
Resolution for 2011: blow jobs are a privilege, not a right.
Atlanta road trip update. Jimmy fell into the petting tank at the aquarium. And freaked out. With cops now... Keep you posted
tried to chug a glass full of ice cubes. went better then expected.
I just lit a blunt like right in front of an old man and I was like sir please shieldeth your eyes
Don't remember anything. Melissa just said I kept saying welcome to the bat cave
It's brunch. If you find dick at brunch. You an A+ hoe.
I'm still waiting for God to smite you for impersonating a decent human being.
last night I used snow as a chaser
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
I accidentally just texted my dad asking if he wants to do shrooms with me. Do I leave the city now or...
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
