Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
My flask crushed my baggie full of aderall in my backpack, why can't my demons just live together in peace
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I'll reiterate. Best drinking game ever. I shall teach it to my children's children
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
we're going to the olympic park to run the 100m yeaaaahhh
it's 3am. Nothing could possibly go wrong here.
Its official, if she bites your dick through your jeans, ya'll go together. A lesson you shouldn't have to learn after the fact.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
I'm recovering from the blowjob...She's doing her taxes...
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
I will pay you in sex, beer and popcorn if you will come fold my clothes for me.
Add free use of your panini press and its a deal.
Deal.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
My vagina just clenched in fear
So, looks like I managed to leave my bra in the boardroom after all the sex. FML.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
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