Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
dude we gotta go shopping. I made pancakes this afternoon and used them as sandwich bread.
she must of just birthed a child cause her labia touched the floor
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
I left my toothbrush at her house. This is getting way too serious for me.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
I'm glad they extended train service last night. People crying, screaming, throwing up, fighting and peeing themselves on a train made me feel like I've got my shit together.
I did the mature thing and subtweeted that bitch. She follows me so she'll see.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Power lunch with dad, pain pills and tequila shots. Dad does Monday hard.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
