Its okay if i dont like him.his junk is just too good to resist.model penis,lame guy.
New discovery: doing the Helen Keller is not as attractive as I thought it would be, in reference to the sex noises.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
Watching a deaf couple have an argument in the mall. Can't bring myself to look away.
she made me put on a condom before giving me a handjob...this is why i hate freshmen
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
He came in like 30 seconds. That's how I know he hasn't been cheating on me while I've been gone
I'm getting to the point of going up to a guy and saying "Hi I'm maggie and i can put my foot behind my head"... That desperate.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
So high I started thinking my desktop picture of a cat was too erotic for the workplace.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
I just woke up to myself peeing the bed. Happy hump day! I'll never get married.
How do you politely tell a guy that you only kissed him so he would shut the fuck up?
I might be getting fired on this week so the only option i see for tonight is to get smashed and have an orgy. actually this idea might explain why i'm not an ideal employee.
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