i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I tried to pay my bar tab with my gym membership card. Twice.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
Hmd? did you really just created an abbrievation for hold my dick?
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
all law school has taught me so far is how to fart quietly during lectures and how to out-argue the ice cream guy when he screws me out of extra toppings.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
the amount of chicks and firearms here is unnerving. this will end awesomely or at the morgue.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Randomize
