Pretty sure she's used to bigger guys. She kept slipping off while on top. like, constantly
this just has baby written all over it
I don't drink during the week.... well, except for Bailey's Tuesdays, which I have to start implementing further.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
My dry heaving is complicating my ability to speak.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
Good news. I heard back from the doctor and I don't have a liver problem.
...yet.
Lead with your genitals is the best advice I can give you.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I'm currently on an epic search all over the city for a drug store that isn't sold out of Plan B. I celebrated your birthday from afar.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
I passed out with the lights and tv on woke up at 4am SO confused and covered in goldfish so I ate them and went back to bed.. fuck xanax
The cure for a hangover evidently is not walking around in a costume in the sun towards of park of screaming children
Randomize
