Nope, Im Irish and pissed with some drunk mixed in...therefore punching things is the best solution to every problem.
He toold me that when we were younger I was his boner buddy.
Apparently I'm the guy that didn't get the memo that Afliction and wifebeaters were the proper attire for tonight... so I'll just sit here alone in my sweatervest and be judged.
The plus side of allergy season is that after our weekend coke binge my runny nose fits right in.
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
i'm pretty sure they aren't charging me for that window i broke with a turkey sandwich while i was hammered.
Just charged fat mistake $3 for a beer.
I need to think of the best way to tell this boy he's not getting his pants back
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
The landlord wasn't even off the porch yet and she was packing a bowl, I can't imagine a better best friend
I fought a guy last night because he said "extra pulp orange juice is the best orange juice"
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
Come eat Chinese buffet and watch us trip on acid. It'll be fun.
Kay so its 9 am whose dumbass is gunna act sober to buy pizza rolls
Dude you promised
Randomize
