So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
He fell asleep and they duct taped him to the floor. He's pissed.
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
Who am I sleeping next to in your bed? Where are you? Also when are you coming home... I need coffee.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
She's on her period. You don't know what fear is.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
When you wear a dress that resembles the shape and color of Kirby to a wedding, you get the attention you deserve.
He just made this face while he was fucking me and he looked like the hunchback of Notre Dame, I had to stop him.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
I'm just letting you know right now in advance that if I die or go to the hospital or end up in jail tonight it's because your kid sold me mushrooms.
Randomize
