Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
Fuck Jersey, the house im in is so baller but this state just cannot win.
Well, I can't relate. I have no idea what it feels like to withhold sex. Or have self-control in general.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
She was standing in the road flagging traffic in a tshirt and boxers. I didn't stop.
All she wanted was a cigarette
He kept stopping sex to whisper in my ear, and the only thing I could understand was "double stuffed oreos"
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
I never want to do this again, I'm going to chew off several fingers and apply for disability
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
We were taking body shots by lunch. I love college.
at any given day I am at least 60% invested in my work. today I am staggered around 3.5%
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
THERES A FUCKBOY IN MY PERSONAL SPACE
GET IT AWAY FROM ME IM ALLERGIC
Oh god I just had an orgasim riding my bike. I need to get laid pronto.
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize