i have yet to find a random guy that would make me want to do any position besides missionary, these are what normal people call "applying standards"
Why does Jon Cryer have a career?
That is a good question.
Just got my cast off. My occupational therapist wants me to self-gratify. My clit is about to have an awesome weekend...
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
This girl caught me staring at the cat but stroking the computer because it was closer, which is why I hate blunts.
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
I've never seen a guy eye-fuck someone so hard in my entire life. I thought he would develop laser vision, bore holes into your body, and not even realize your innards would be spilling everywhere. That's how bad it was.
Just bought weed from the ice cream man. The kid in front of me got a tootie fruitie.
He just pulled out my weave during sex....needless to say I'm embarrassed and in need of another shot pronto
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
I am now banned from the bar... Because you got head from my ex in the woman's restroom
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
Randomize
