You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
her vagine was all disorganized.
I think I'm maturing; i was gonna watch porn and then take a nap but i motivated myself to put my laundry in first.
Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
At the T-Rex bar with my nephew...only in Disney can I have a beer and a soda at the bar with a 4 year old
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
We found her naked passed out on the bathroom floor. She didn't even make it to the shower. She was clutching the bathroom rug.
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
The bartender gave me the kids toys. Paddle ball & a gecko.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
He went to WalMart with $30 and came back with a watch, a basketball and an engagement ring.
Please come and kill me with a brick you dont even have to be nice about it just smash myfucking skull in this is the worst hangover ive had for at least a week
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
I love that you'd blow off your high school reunion to get shit faced in an aquarium with us
Um. We all know how I feel about sea life
I wasn't supposed to sleep w him. So of course I sent him gps location to my bed.
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