got some bad news about ur virginity. she didnt make it thru the night
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
Okay. thanks for sacraficing your body and risking aids for our snowcone business.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Made eye contact with his twin sister the day after he gave me a lifechanging blowjob. Do you think she knows?
It's like the hunger games, but we're gonna bone each other instead of kill each other
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
How is someone going to pee on the floor two days in a row? Fuck this place.
I think I came out of my blackout as I was ordering wine from the private wedding reception.
Ur creepiness is now affecting my life and I'm not okay with it
Got lost on the way to my dealer again. He stayed on the phone with me untill i found him and then hooked it up because I got lost.. What a genuine person.
Randomize
