he likes ron paul.... that's all i'm going to say....
oh no you fucking didn't eat my mac and cheese you cunt
I hope my liver is having as much fun as I am
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
In the future let's not drunk dive in the fountain in front of the hotel bar.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
I will not hesitate to go down on a dick for some cream soda.
I'm venturing to your corner of this sin house in t minus 2 minutes.
Just took last nights make up off with a sock. That hungover.
Double vision is so hot when a big dick is in sight. Thank you Bud Light.
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Someone should make a valentines day card that says "I like the way you continuously consume thc with no concept of a limit other than drug supply" Because I'd send that to you.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
He went to 7/11 first and came back with condoms and a banana "in case we get hungry"
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