i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
I've been awake for 20+ hrs. What does that mean? I just realized if BSB were Twilight characters, Brian would be Jake and Howie would be Edward based on the video for "Everybody". That's unsettling.
It's unsettling that you took the time to think about that.
Checked out the free sonogram van on campus and got a free DVD of my sweet food baby.
At what point in my life was I not hugged enough to be on my fourth walk of shame in half as many weeks?
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
Remember when puke and rally meant a good time? Fuck pregnancy
When you finally get laid, I shall make you a trophy out of dildos
Because the guy guy doing the drawing either wanted to bone, or wanted us to stop entering the contest. Either way, we got concert tickets so I'm cool with both scenarios.
They were out of soap so you started calling yourself a dirty bitch
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I was stuffing my face while buying a brownie and coffee and some kid I fucked came up behind me and said. Someone's hungry.
Randomize
