It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
i have more money on itunes than i do in my bank account... college.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
I'm in the liquor aisle and a 10 yr old boy yells, "My favorite beer is Corona! Daddy remember when you gave me some on our camping trip?"
These old men are woofing at me..PLEASE HURRY
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
I just told the toilet I loved it. Bad sign.
there's a girl on facebook trying to buy me a pizza. I can't say no... right?
I think that thing where I have 2 boyfriends is happening again
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
i am no longer ashamed when i walk into the dining hall for sunday brunch and i'm greeted with applause for suriving my weekend
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
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